Honrny chat

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You claim you're tired and cancel dinner plans in lieu of "watching a movie" with him. Because "watching a movie" has been code for sex since high school. And you spent every moment of the epic two-hour block of beautifying time thinking about how awesome doing it is gonna be. At a bar, you do a tequila shot and tell everyone it makes you "soooo horny" so you have an excuse for your normal non-tequila-induced horniness level.

You shaved/trimmed/lotioned every inch of yourself this morning because IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN.

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